This happened about two days ago. So, about 4 months ago I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years, needless to say there was sex. Lots of sex (I have a really high sex drive, so.. that happened). The first month after our break up I was pretty down, it simply didn't work out and it bummed me out pretty badly. I didn't feel pretty or cute anymore (yes, I broke up with him... but it was still really difficult because of the circumstances. I still loved him) and didn't feel like masturbating at all (even when I was with him I would touch myself at least once a day honestly). The second month I was keeping myself busy - Yoga, volleyball, picnics, friends, gaming and just sort of didn't feel like it. I was still mourning. Same with the next two months.
So finally, I'm done with month 4 and I realize '... you haven't played with yourself in way too long' and I'm like 'lets do this'. So I buckle myself the fuck down in bed and I'm like 'k'. Mind you, I don't use a vibrator because I'm quite shy and I'm afraid of buying one in a store and buying one online requires a person to deliver it and I'd answer the door 100% red faced. I don't know... anyways. I should mention that my roommates parents were staying over. I think we all know where this is going. Kind of. So there I am, fiddling my fadoodle and it's going great. However, I'm pretty loud (but she lives downstairs and I guess sometimes I underestimate how loud I can be...). So, I'm watching porn (and I'm pretty submissive, so my loudness includes me ... saying. Certain things. And calilng myself names, not sure why that helps me but in this situation it just... I should've shut up) and everythings jolly the sun is shining and my vaginas like 'I deserve this tbh'. Quality time.
So I'm at the peak of the god damn mountain, and I'm like 'NAH. EDGE'. So I edged. For a while. (MIND YOU, I THOUGHT MY ROOMMATES PARENTS WERE GONE... SINCE... THEY SAID THEY WERE LEAVING EARLIER). Finally I let myself finish and I'm flailing around a bit, quite loudly and my door opens. My roommates mother is staring at me with wide, regretful eyes and there I am attempting to get a hold on my orgasm... causing me to try covering myself while recovering. I hit my ankle on my wall super hard, fall off of my bed while doing so and land on my cat who was apparently under my bed until the door opened. This results in my darling cat flipping her shit, scratching me and running. So here I am on the ground, bleeding with an apparently broken ankle (yep, I hit it that hard), naked and recovering from orgasm. My roommates mother is in between laughing and being very concerned. She literally closed the door... then opened it again to ask if I was hurt, to which I told her I was. She helped me to get dressed since my ankle was preventing me from doing so and then she drove me to the hospital.
edit : Okay, I will order a vibrator from amazon I swear guyz ims rry
Omg look who got narrated. Me. Hehe. http://ift.tt/1yHCvcQ Tl;dr: OP needs to be quieter when masturbating. Fadoodle gods were not pleased.
submitted by starwarsisntreallife to tifu
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from reddit: the front page of the internet http://ift.tt/1EyeVny
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