This was two days ago, but whatever.
So, me and a buddy had been drinking in Manchester (UK) watching some rugby, you know, Brit stuff. After a long afternoon session of beer and large men hurting each other we headed off into the night to catch the last train home to our town (about 40 mins away).
We board the train and it's pretty quiet, few other drunks but that was about it. We where oblivious to the brunette sat on the other side of the train and like drunken fools, we decide that it would be great to have a sing along and see if we can get the other drinkers involved. So we started out with a rendition of "Don't wanna miss a thing" that probably sounded like we where slaying multiple cats. After the first verse and chorus this brunette must've decided enough was enough and shouted at us to shut up. No drama in my eyes as it couldn't have been pleasant. But not to my buddy. No no, this devious little bastard didn't wanna give up and elequently told the woman to "Show us your dick" (Don't blame him, he was drunk).
Much to my surprise this woman draws a bright blue dildo out of a bag and throws it at him. Shes not a great shot as I got a forehead full of rubber dick. This is then followed up packets of lube and a secondary dildo. Turns out we pissed of a sexual education teacher, she gathered her dicks and lube and sat quietly to wait for her stop.
TL;DR: Sang Aerosmith, got hit in the face with a dildo.
submitted by CptAmerification to tifu
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